ast winter, the UK found itself trapped in a hellish
Frank
Zappa-style dystopia when its government declared a Yellow Snow Alert
after some mysterious white powder fell out of the sky. Such terrifying blizzard
conditions may get a chuckle from Canadians and Americans, but scientists
warn it could happen again soon.
The benefits of global warming: England swallowed up by kudzu and palm trees in London. Credit: Dan Sodergren and AI Artists
Global warming is like racism: everything causes it, and it causes everything. It's an excuse to create a continual state of crisis that can be used to drown us in economy-killing and freedom-crushing rules.
Proof of this comes from a bunch of 'futurists' who came out with a fantasy of what London will look like in 2050. They painted pretty pictures of happy smiling pedestrians riding bikes and walking across bridges over the Thames toward giant Tupperware domes overflowing with vast piles of what looks like kudzu. Another picture showed wonderful swaying palm trees in downtown London with smiling British pedestrians happily walking around on car-free streets in the warm tropical sunshine.
Futurists perform a valuable service. Their job is to convince us that our common sense is totally wrong: we'll all upload our consciousness into machines, we'll be free of the burden of actually owning stuff, and there will someday be a sunny day in England. The idea of the capital city of the UK swallowed up by a mile-deep covering of kudzu makes people happy and convinces them not to worry.
It seemed to me that these futurist fantasies were actually proof that they believe global warming, whenever it occurs, will be the greatest thing ever, and we ought to figure out some way to cause it. One of them wrote:
Cycling is freeing, fun and you'd be surprised by how fast you can move through the city on an e-bike. We hope that the pictures inspire people to visualise how more liveable cities will look once they are less congested.
Actually, it inspires me to stock up on Round Up.
More benefits of global warming: In the USA, foxes are now thriving in suburbia. I won't even mention all those deer. Amazing what one whole degree can accomplish
Translation: get used to not having a car. Much of Wales is now apparently crippled by a 20 mph speed limit, specifically intended to safeguard the environment by encouraging people to walk by making walking faster than driving. Here in the USA, our government geniuses are planning to eliminate gas-fueled vehicles altogether and replacing them with electric cars, which rely on storing quantities of energy roughly enough to get you out of your driveway and halfway to the nearest Dollar General before going flat. The obvious purpose is to eliminate personal transportation altogether.
If you want to get rid of cars in the city, give us an alternative that is cheaper, faster, safe, and convenient. People will automatically flock to it. You don't have to lie and say you're banning cars because of global warming, and back it up by calling skeptics dirty names.
Maybe battery tech will improve someday. But the bottleneck will always be getting all that energy into the battery. The rate of energy transfer is determined by physics, not by government, so we'll get nuclear fusion engines before we get a fast charging battery. So here is my version of a futurist prediction.
Electricity rates will go through the roof as utilities try to build more infrastructure.
People will complain and the government will enact crippling rules on the utilities as they did in California.
This will result in outages, downed lines, fires, and media clamoring to nationalize the incompetent corrupt profit-seeking utilities on the theory that incompetent corrupt profit-seeking government can do it better.
After nationalization, each individual is allocated a certain amount of electricity. Those who vote correctly get more. Troublemakers get less.
Bloggers will get canceled for pointing out that electric cars don't necessarily do a darn thing for global warming.
Now, I have to admit. If the government gets its way and geoengineers succeed in their mad scheme of blocking the Sun, it is true that people in England will be able to walk across the Thames. They won't even need a bridge. As for riding a bike, in case you've never tried, it's impossible to do it on two inches of solid ice. I used to live way up north. Trust me on this.
It's also true that if they succeed in sequestering carbon dioxide, the cities will be a lot less crowded. It's not a conspiracy theory to claim that reducing CO2 by half would kill many of our food plants, simultaneously taking care of those nasty global warming-inducing cows. So we don't really have to worry about London being swallowed up in kudzu.
There's only one solution: people need to study the science thoroughly and skeptically. It's hard and time-consuming, but this is something that will affect your life in countless ways. You will find that the total amount of warming is just over one whole degree and the scientific basis for a “crisis” is a lot shakier than they want us to think. If we're going to walk into this, at least don't do it blindly.
If it's really a crisis, scientific journals should bring all articles on global warming outside their paywalls as they did during the Covid crisis. Let the public evaluate the evidence for themselves instead of concealing it from them.
While I wait for that to happen, I plan to stock up on plastic straws, RoundUp, and styrofoam paper plates.
sep 24 2023, 7:27 am
